Games are recommended on a four-point scale like those "strongly agree/disagree" questions you get on surveys. This scale goes "Strongly", "If you like this kinda game", "Watch it online", and "Avoid at all costs" from best to worst. It's one part how likely I am to replay the game and one part how likely I am to recommend it to fans of that game's genre. I'm not in the business of objectivity, just what's fun to me. No reason to play a game if you're not having fun, yeah?
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Not many old-school Nicktoons games get modern remakes, so what does that say about Battle for Bikini Bottom? Says it's pretty good! Plankton's evil scheme to mass-manufacture robots to break him into the Krusty Krab goes haywire, and now every inch of Bikini Bottom is crawling with a surprisingly imaginative array of goo bots, stun bots (kinky), fire-breathing bots, sleepy bots, Texas bots, a lot of robots, okay. It's up to SpongeBob, Patrick, and Sandy to take turns kicking ass and eventually taking on themselves in giant robot form—how meta.
Bikini Bottom takes you everywhere, from the relative scenic peace of Jellyfish Fields and Goo Lagoon (go find the Atari controller sandcastle) to the eerie depths of Rock Bottom, the Mermalair, and the Flying Dutchman's graveyard, and even some slightly stranger spots in between. You ever wanted to see what Patrick dreams of? You ever wanted to race down Sand Mountain? Actually, those sliding areas are easily the most fun part of the game, whether you're taking it fast or exploring the branching slopes, it's a good-ass time.
The platforming is pretty beyond reproach, and while not every stage hits (I never liked the Kelp Forest or the Mermalair, truth be told), there's more than plenty that do. SpongeBob also gains abilities over the course of the game, and they're all pretty killer. Seriously, the Bubble Bowling move is so much fun, there's a gigantic playable skii-ball machine in Goo Lagoon. How fun is that? And that's my biggest takeaway from Battle for Bikini Bottom—there's so many little side areas, changes of pace, and fun little extras to find in each level that 100%ing it is a pleasure, not a pain, no small feat for Heavy Iron Studios.
| Reviewed | My favorite part | Recommended? |
|---|---|---|
| June 13, 2025 | The sliding sections | Strongly |
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